Tuesday, December 23, 2014




"BLUE" JIMMY:  In a move unheard of in my vast journalistic memory,  a major movie studio, Sony, has pulled a movie, "The Interview," from theaters due to objection to its content.  Some may argue that the objection to the film's content came in the form of an unprecedented cyber-hack and also contained threats of violence to moviegoers, thereby making the move necessary.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  Yet people get to see the travesty of all three sh***y "Beverly Hills Chihuahua"  movies in HD!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The history of the motion picture industry is full of examples of protests and attempts to censor.  The 1915 film, "Birth of a Nation" the first 12 reel film in America,  was protested by the NAACP due to its negative characterization of black folks (who were played by white actors in blackface) and its portrayal of the Klu Klux Klan as heroes.  In my lifetime,  I remember quite a s**t  storm being raised over the release of many films and subsequent attempts to censor by protesters:   "Lolita" for glorifying pedophilia; "Caligula" for its decadent violence and sexuality; "Cruising" for portraying the gay community as sado-masochistic bondage fiends; "The Last Temptation of Christ" for its depiction of Jesus Christ as having un-saviorlike human qualities; "Schindler's List" for being "Jewish propaganda" and "The Exorcist" for being...well, "The Exorcist."  By the way, Mr. William (director of "The Exorcist") Friedkin,  you owe me twenty years of sleep!


"BLUE"  JIMMY:  What is unique about this incident is that it is not really a case of censorship at all.  For example in the past, blatantly pornographic films such as "Deep Throat" and "Behind The Green Door"  were pulled from theaters due to actions by the police, the courts and the FBI.  Theater owners, directors and even actors were arrested for their participation.  There was no such legal pressure for "The Interview."  Sony pulled the movie voluntarily and made it seem as though it was a public safety issue.  Now, New Regency has announced that a film set in North Korea starring popular actor, Steve Carell has been scrapped due to ... oh, I don't know, what do they call it?

BLIND DOG OZZY:  Lack of balls!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The cyber-hack has been blamed on North Korea with other less-than-friendly countries being named as co-conspirators.  It really doesn't matter.  Whether the movie depicts two zany journalists being asked to assassinate the leader of North Korea in a comedy (the plot of "The Interview") or it depicts children being subjected to sadistic sexual torture and murder such as in the film, "Salo or the 120 days of Sodom" ( a 1975 film still banned in many countries to this day), a cowardly, anonymous threat issued on the Internet should not be able to shut down a lemonade stand, much less a multi-million dollar production by a major movie studio.  You can foresee the dangerous precedent being set with this incident.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  We might long for the days when ratings boards, TV preachers and parent's groups would determine our entertainment.  At least there was some thought behind it.  Now, any geek in Starbucks with a laptop can determine what we see, read or hear.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Dude!  I need more info.  My gut feeling is that there's more to the story than a cyber-hack by a foreign entity and a movie studio concerned about the safety of moviegoers.  It all seems too convenient.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  Like an attack by "terrorists" on the Pentagon and The World Trade Center that justifies a war in Iraq and Afghanistan.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Sake's Alive!


Friday, December 5, 2014


"BLUE" JIMMY:  The other day some people came to my door wanting to inspect my house for potential West Nile Virus hazards.  I did the same as I do for the Jehovah's Witnesses and ignored them.  
BLIND DOG OZZY:  I ran outside and tipped over the stagnant birdbath!
"BLUE" JIMMY:  Government agents wanting to come into your home and search for disease -- conspiracy?
BLIND DOG OZZY:  If not, f**k it, let's create one!
"BLUE"  JIMMY:  Okay, Ebola has been in news...
BLIND DOG OZZY:  I thought Ebola was that oil everyone is using.
"BLUE" JIMMY:  You're thinking of canola.  Ebola is a bad virus that makes you bleed out your eyeballs.


"BLUE" JIMMY:  I been hearing in the news that Ebola is no longer a threat and that we have nothing to worry about if we use hand sanitizer and avoid frolics in West Africa.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  BULLS**T!!!  There's an old saying in American Journalism that says, (something like) "If ten people die in the U.S. it's news, if one hundred people die in Canada it's news -- but no one ever dies in Africa.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The implication is that the closer people are to Americans in language and culture, the closer they are to our hearts.  No one cares about an African villager family who loses their only child.  The truth is that a series of bureaucratic screw ups allowed the Ebola virus to spread like a MF:  People in African villages were told that Ebola was incurable so they did not seek treatment; hundreds of thousands of dollars in medical aid could not reach its target because of red tape; medical experts could not obtain visas to travel to Africa and the World Health Organization (the United Nations' health agency) claimed it was hampered by budget cuts (?).  

BLIND DOG OZZY:  But there's billions of dollars to fight wars!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  It's sheer dumb luck (or is it?) that the Ebola virus is not an airborne virus.  Your have to get kind of up-close-and-personal with a brother or sister to get the Ebola virus.  Just like AIDS, there's got to be fluid transmission.  The baddest bitch of them all when it comes to airborne viruses was (or is) the Smallpox virus.  If the Smallpox virus doesn't kill you, one look in the mirror will.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  Madre de Dios!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Smallpox was responsible for hundreds of millions of deaths in the last century until a vaccine was developed and through diligent and fearless work by healthcare workers, was declared completely eradicated by about 1980 -- or was it?  As any history of the disease will tell you, the last samples of Smallpox were retained by the United States and the U.S.S.R. for "research" purposes.  In 1986 the World Health Organization recommended that all remaining samples of the disease be destroyed thereby, eliminating Smallpox from Planet Earth forever.  To this date, the United States and Russia still retain stocks of the Smallpox virus for no benevolent  purpose since it would not be needed to fight any new outbreaks of the disease.  Why keep it?

BLIND DOG OZZY:  DUN DUN DUN!!!  ( here's our conspiracy theory!)

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The recent outbreak (!) of popular films featuring zombies is very suspicious.  The films typically depict a bloody horde of demented, corpse-like things attacking normal people who are deathly afraid of being infected with the zombie virus.  Reports from Third World countries say that people with severe viral infections will exhibit symptoms of delirium and will stumble around their villages in a diseased stupor that will make superstitious villagers think that they have come back from the dead.  I'm also reminded of the first X-Files movie where the paranoid conspiracy theorist informs agent Mulder that the rulers of the world will reduce the population through a "plague to end all plagues."  Conspiracy Insiders have informed us that Hollywood will often reveal things to the general population in gradual, sugary, entertaining amounts in order to buffer us from the shocking, eventual truth.  It's already clear that governments across the world including our own, are ill-prepared to handle an epidemic that could have been contained by quick medical response and proper hygiene much less an airborne plague that could jump continents in a matter of days.


"BLUE" JIMMY:  NOTE:  The historical and medical information in this article is factual.  The conspiracy theory part we pulled out of our ass.

BLIND DOG OZZY:  It could happen!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Sake's Alive!



Wednesday, April 30, 2014




"BLUE" JIMMY:  OOOOOOHHHH!!!  Someone done blew it.  A rich, white man gets spanked big time and folks of color are celebrating like Rev. King just gave his "I Have A Dream" speech.  The National Basketball Association on Tuesday, handed down its harshest penalty by placing a  ban on Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling for life and basically cutting all ties to the team he owns.

BD OZZY:  Damn!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The ban is due to the fact that he made some extremely ignorant and racist remarks in an argument with his girlfriend where he berates her for associating with black folks such as basketball legend Magic Johnson and then "broadcasting" it to the world on social media.  

BD OZZY:  He then goes on to demonstrate an ole time mentality straight outta  "Huckleberry Finn" where he sounds like a plantation owner trying to rationalize his ownership of slaves.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Dude!  There's no doubt that his remarks were shameful and worthy of condemnation by the NBA, but there are civil rights issues here that have nothing to do with race.  He was punished for remarks he made in a private conversation which he probably never intended for anyone else to hear and expressed opinions which are unpopular but nevertheless,  not illegal.  I can't believe I just wrote that.  The concept of an illegal opinion is something you would only think of when referring to totalitarian governments such as the former USSR, Communist China or science fiction novels such as Phillip K. Dick's 1956 book "The Minority Report" where people are arrested for crimes they are thinking about committing.  In college, I remember talking with people who had escaped from fascist regimes in countries where their phone conversations were tapped and they were imprisoned for remarks they made critical of the government.  At the time I remember thinking, "that could never happen here!"


"BLUE" JIMMY:  The NBA should have given its most stringent, bad boy scolding to Sterling and let him live in shame for the rest of his life but to strip a man of his property for politically incorrect opinions is pretty ... what's the word?

BD OZZY:  Orwellian!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Thank You!  How many of us have said things in private which would get us in deep s**t if they were made public?  Due to smart phones, tablets and miniature audio and video recording devices, our private spaces are constantly shrinking.  How many times have you thought you were having a quiet, private moment only to look up and see that sinister, black plastic surveillance bubble staring you in the face.  Some people are calling for these cameras to be put in public toilets to prevent crime.  At the moment of this writing,  the Supreme Court is deciding whether police officers have the right to go through and download the contents of your cell phone when making a routine stopIn 1949, the author George Orwell wrote about these invasions of your privacy in his book, "1984."  At the time, people thought the book was far-fetched and that he was crazy ... was he?

BD OZZY:  Dun Dun Dun!!!

"BLUE" JIMMY: Sake's Alive!

BD OZZY:  Wow!  Wow!


Friday, February 28, 2014




"BLUE" JIMMY:  There's a great scene in the classic film "Glengarry GlenRoss" where Dave Moss, the character played by Ed Harris, walks into the office in a sh**ty mood and says, "The rich get richer, that's the law of the land!"  Since his character is a total d**k, you think he's just being cynical but old cliches like that about wealth and money making come to mind when I consider a couple of articles I read recently.  The first one was about an 11 year-old Illinois  girl named Heather Stirling who makes cupcakes out of her home taking in about $80 bucks a week and putting the money away to buy a car when she's old enough.  Of course, this type of human interest story was noticed by the local newspaper and they did an article showcasing her cupcakes and entrepreneurial spirit.  The local health department also read her story and being the typical meddling government bureaucracy that they are, came and shut down her "business" and told her that she couldn't continue unless her parents built a separate bakery for her.

BD OZZY: Hey idiots!  If her parents had that kind of money, she wouldn't need to be baking cupcakes for money in her mommy's kitchen!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  That's the whole point brother!  The little girl, who also runs a pet sitting business, is a perfect example of someone trying to pull themselves up by their boot straps ( to use another cliche).  What do folks always tell down and out souls on the street when they ask for change?  "Get a job!  Make your own money!"

BD OZZY:  But when someone comes up with an idea to make a little pocket change, The Man is always there to step on your neck and hold you down.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Amen!  But that brings us to the other article I read which deals with a man named Patrick Combs who in 1995, received one of those spam emails from some get-rich-quick company with a phony check attached showing an example of how much money he could be making.  The check, which was for $95,000., had his name on it but it also said right across the front, "Not Negotiable For Cash."  Combs, who was trying to earn a living as a motivational speaker and was something of a joker, signed the check with a smiley face and deposited the check in his ATM.  Combs expected the bank to call him, praise his sense of humor and laughingly tell him that the check was not real.  To make a long story short, the next time he went to his ATM, he found his balance had gone up by $95,000. and a short time later, he was told he could start withdrawing the funds.  He withdrew the money, put it all in a safe deposit box (never intending to keep it) and made his bank jump through hoops to get the money back since it was legally his to keep.  The whole tale is told in his book "Man 1, Bank 0" as well as an often sold out one man show which he performs all over the world for a fee of $5,000. per night.  Between royalties from his book, tips in his PayPal account from people who read the story on his website and his speaking engagements, he makes well over the $95,000. he could have kept due to his bank's screw up.

BD OZZY:  I would have kept the money and then wrote a book and one man show about how I spent it!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  So you see where I'm going here?  Why does one person get shut down after making a few honest bucks and another has riches dumped in their lap not once but several times?  What is the nature of wealth?  Does it favor those with business savvy?  There are a lot of folks with business degrees who are broke.  Does it favor the righteous?  There's a lot of poor good people. Perhaps it favors those with the most desire for it as Gordon Gekko says, "Greed is Good."

BD OZZY:  I think it's sheer dumb luck!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  There are certain people who have made it their life's work to study the habits of people who have consistent wealth and abundance in their lives.  In his book, "Inner Vegas: Creating Miracles, Abundance and Health" Joseph Gallenberger, Ph. D., makes the assertion that wealth favors those who don't go through life with a sense of lack and who live in a constant state of gratitude and generosity.

BD OZZY:  But how to balance this with the panic of having bills pile up and having people all around you with their hands out.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Dude!  How very astute!  Do the rich get richer as Dave Moss says?  Or do certain people just attract wealth? One theory I read about recently, proposes that if all the wealth in the world was redistributed equally among every person, within a few years, the bulk of all the wealth would be in the same hands of the people who have it now.  How does this happen? Comment if you have more to say about this subject or have an interesting story about the nature of wealth.

BD OZZY:   And send your donations!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Sake's Alive!

BD OZZY:  Wow!  Wow!