Tuesday, January 29, 2013

THE TAO OF TE'O

"BLUE" JIMMY:  SOCIAL NETWORK CRITIC

BLIND DOG OZZY:  NEUROTIC CHIHUAHUA

"BLUE" JIMMY:  The recent fake girlfriend scandal involving Notre Dame football star Manti Te'o has seemed to have caught the popular imagination.

BD OZZY:  Mostly because it's a perfect example of catfishing, a term inspired by the 2010 film "Catfish" which documents a young man being hoodwinked by a bored, frumpy homemaker who misrepresents herself online.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Like a blind Chihuahua who talks and writes a blog.

BD OZZY:  Bite me!

"BLUE"  JIMMY:  So many questions remained unanswered in this incident such as who exactly, was involved, why didn't Te'o come clean earlier and did this incident propel Te'o to be a runner up for the Heisman Trophy.

BD OZZY:  But the biggest question of all is how the hell  do you fall in love and consider someone your girlfriend when you've never met them in person?

"BLUE" JIMMY:  I don't even take on a car insurance dude unless I meet them in person.  I think that technology, especially social networking, is creating a serious disconnect between humans which any anthropologist will tell you, are social beings that thrive on close personal contact.

BD OZZY:  We were warned of this back in the 70's by Alvin Toffler in his book "Future Shock" which predicted that technology would advance so quickly that it would cause us psychological as well as physiological harm because of our inability to keep up with it.   He called this information overload.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Dude!  That's right.  Think about it.  people use an ATM instead of asking a teller for money, they swipe their credit or debit card at the gas station instead of asking the attendant for gas, ( some folks don't even remember gas stations that had attendants) they do their shopping on their computer and have everything delivered to their door instead of going to an actual store, they let their GPS drive their car and they carry on conversations with their smart phones.  It's no wonder people of Teo's generation think they can have an online soul mate.  

BD OZZY:  It also seems people are looking outside of themselves for happiness instead of within.

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Brother, you been reading my "Zen for Dummies" book again.  The real trip about people in these situations is when they find out who they really been talkin' to online.  Young girls with a crush find out they've been talking to some old pervert, housewives find out they've been the victim of some geeky computer nerd living in their grandma's basement and  lonely guys looking for love find out they been talking to some guy altering their voice on the phone.

BD OZZY:  (singing) "...looking for love in all the wrong places..."

"BLUE" JIMMY:  I hate that song.  But that reminds me, if there's any fine mamas out there looking for a date, down below is an updated photo of me an' Ozzy.

BD OZZY:  Yeah, right!  my d*** is bigger than that whole dog!

"BLUE" JIMMY:  Sake's Alive!

BD OZZY:  Wow!  Wow! 






No comments:

Post a Comment